How to Stop the Comparison Game

How to Stop the Comparison Game

“You’d never be jealous of someone if you knew who you were. You would never want someone else’s gift if you knew why you were alive.” – Bill Johnson

What a riveting quote, right?

When you read it what comes to mind for you?

For me it was one of the most powerful, bold, and liberating quotes I had heard in a very long time.

I remember saying, “Did he really just say that?”

He did.

…Have you ever compared yourself to another woman?

I have.

It’s not a great feeling!

It’s from the chains of comparison that we unnecessarily elevate ourselves higher than we ought to -or condemn ourselves if we don’t feel like we are quite making the mark.

Comparison can lead to jealousy, resentment, bitterness and can land you in a place of false empowerment if you’re not careful.

We compare body shapes and our looks, cars, clothes, success, status…and skin color…as we are reminded by the reality of our current events locally and around the globe due to the fight for racial justice.

How to Stop the Comparison Game

Well, I was never comfortable in my own skin and grew up comparing myself to everyone. In my 30s I went to work doing my inner game soul work, knowing that comparison was the thief of joy, authentic confidence, a sense of personal empowerment and so much more.

It’s why I ❤️ that authentic identity is at the center of my body of work. …

With the honesty of this personal struggle, and as a personal brand/style consultant & life coach, what I know to be true is this: If you want to up level your personal and professional success, you must break the chains of #comparison.

Opening with a vulnerable story of how my jealously almost got the best of me, I was honored to speak about this topic at Bettina Carey’s Women’s Empowerment Summit earlier this month. Catch the replay above.

Be Uniquely Savvy: 7 Tips for Breaking Free From The Chains of Comparison is a game changer for those who want to create and live their authentic best while living their vision of success with purpose and meaning!

Take a listen and shoot me an email. Let me know your thoughts. Would love to learn where comparison is holding you back and help you dream and imagine what life could look like if you were…free!

Still on journey.

With love from The Coach’s Corner, XO

Kim Peterson

Kim Peterson

Keynote Speaker I Trainer I Brand Strategist |Coach
www.uniquelysavvy.com

about

Kim Peterson

From homelessness to becoming one of “425 Magazine’s Women to Watch”, Kim Peterson’s mission is to help you reclaim your power by growing deep roots of authentic identity so that you increase your confidence, credibility, and influence while achieving greater levels of success and fulfillment -with greater ease.

Kim is a global speaker, trainer, and coach for individuals, teams, and organizations such as Boeing, Amazon, and Vistage International.

Leaders, emerging leaders, and high achievers just like you tend to work with Kim when they want to develop sustainable self-confidence, effective communication skills, a personal vision of success, and/or an authentic personal brand that acts as their guiding North Star.

Kim’s body of work helps bring clarity to the following:

• Who am I?
• What are my strengths, values, unique brand promise of value, and my WHY?
• How can I maximize my strengths & align them with my aspirations and vision?
• How can I holistically package myself to stand out in a crowded marketplace?
• How can I dress to communicate my value, expertise and trustworthiness?
• How can I speak with greater confidence, clarity, and impact?

Kim founded Uniquely Savvy, INC in 2000 and shares her story of transformation and moving from Fear to Freedom in her co-authored book,
Incredible Life: Top Experts Reveal How to Create Yours.

The Green Flash

The Green Flash

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I Thought I Might Be Dying

Okay, I wasn’t actually dying, but in the middle of the night, I couldn’t sleep. I felt warm, and
then I felt cold. I would cough, just once. During this time of the worldwide pandemic, we have
all wondered if we are sick with the coronavirus. Or when we do have any physical signs of
illness, we worry about what we might be facing. I thought maybe I had caught coronavirus, too.
I thought of all the people suffering from COVID-19. Finally, I got out of bed to go downstairs
and have a cup of hot tea.

A Flash of Gratitude

As I was walking to the bedroom door, I asked myself, “What if this was the last night of my life?
How would you feel if this was it?” As I turned and looked at my sleeping husband, and as I
considered my life, a feeling of gratitude filled my whole body. It was a shockingly, thorough,
and quick sensation. Profound gratitude rushed through my body like a green flash.

The Green Flash

We vacation in Mazatlan, Mexico, each year. The horizon in front of the Inn Beach Resort has a
gorgeous ocean view. At sunset, if you stop to watch and are especially lucky, you can see a
green flash as the sun goes behind an island hill in the distance. The split-second green flash is
legendary.

Back in Bed

As I climbed back into bed, I thought of all the people in the hospital throughout the world who
were fighting for their life. I said a prayer, hoping that they would feel a flash of gratitude for their
lives and their loved ones. The Spirit of Love is close to everyone, especially in times of
suffering.

The Green Flash
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The Next Morning

The next morning I did some research. I learned the green flash occurs at sunrise and sunset. It
is an optical phenomenon that you can see shortly after sunset or before sunrise. It happens
when the sun is almost entirely below the horizon, with the barest edge of the sun – the upper
edge – still visible. For a second or two, that upper rim of the sun will appear green in color. It’s
said that once you’ve seen a green flash, you’ll never again go wrong in matters of the heart.
(Source)

Living Within This Reality

The flash of gratitude I experienced came from within me and, at the exact same time, was
activated beyond me. For as long as I live, I will always remember every cell of my body filled
with gratitude. Gratitude is no longer just a concept or something I will try to remember to do.
Now I know what complete gratitude feels like. My prayer is that I will live within this reality every
day, and when I someday take my last breath.

As I imagine the green flash of the sunrise, I awaken in the morning am grateful for my life. As I
lay my head down at night, I am grateful for the day.

Our Dying Are Not Alone

If your loved family member or friend has passed away, I hope you find comfort in knowing that
the Creator of Life is intimately present and lovingly carried him or her to a place of Light and
Peace. In their last breath, we can trust their bodies were filled with love and gratitude, and they
knew they were not alone.

If you want to talk, please reach out to me at danigreen.today.

 Dani Green

Dani Green

Dani Green
The Soul Power Experience Creator
www.danigreen.today | hello@danigreen.today
425-359-4906

about

Dani Green

Dani Green is the Creator of The Soul Power Experience using motivational speaking, education and hypnotherapy. Dani also helps clients reduce stress, smoking cessation and weight release. As an Ordained Minister, Dani writes and officiates Weddings and Funerals. Dani and her husband, Kevin have three adult children and have hosted 15 international students.

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Becoming An Options Thinker!

Becoming An Options Thinker!

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Sometimes in life, without realizing it, we fall into the trap of thinking we have no options, no choices in a situation. We feel like something has happened to us and we have no power over it. We feel that we are a victim of its circumstances. We believe that we have no choice but to be negatively affected by it. We are convinced that we are doomed to let it overpower us forever.  

Yes, there are times when unexpected, horrendous things do happen to us. It may have truly been through no fault of our own. We could not have seen it coming. We did not do anything to cause it. It may have happened to us as a child, or we were in a circumstance, at the time that we could not remove ourselves from. Tragically, most women have found themselves in these situations. Traumatic events can take a lifetime to overcome. Operating from a place of choices, options, and power can help us heal more thoroughly.

How we choose to react to a situation is the most powerful tool we have. The outcome can be completely different if we choose to react with our power in mind. Notice I said choose. This is where we may again fall into the trap of thinking we have no choice about how we react to a horrendous situation. Even if we reacted negatively, to begin with, we have the option of adjusting our reaction and thinking positively and powerfully, once we realize we are holding ourselves back.

It is so important to know that we have personal power in any situation. Sometimes it takes searching for that power and enlisting the help of someone else to help us find it. Having no power at the time of the incident doesn’t mean that we have no choice about how we handle the outcome later. It doesn’t mean that we have no choice about how to react to it when we realize it doesn’t have to overpower us forever. It doesn’t mean that we have no way to find our power to move forward and to heal.

At times, it may seem like the options we have are slim or that we have to choose between the lesser of two evils, or that all the options we have stink. Yes, sometimes all the options seem not worth choosing and that can make us feel stuck and powerless. Often, we are just too close to the situation and it takes someone else to help us think outside of the box and see clearly. Having someone who can help us think of all the options is gold! In the end, after weighing all the options, it is our choice, and there is huge personal power in that!

Becoming An Options Thinker!

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So, how do we know if we are stuck in this mode of not seeing our choices? It’s tricky because sometimes we have been operating this way our entire life and we are not aware of it. This kind of thinking can be generational. Something passed down from grandmother to mother to daughter, without knowing it. It can be very difficult to identify if this has been the case. 

Here are a few questions we can ask ourselves to “check-in” and see if we are stuck in no-option mode:

  • Am I still blaming someone for a circumstance long after that situation has long passed? Am I describing the situation in a way that says I still blame someone for it? This can be difficult if a situation was caused by someone else and was not our fault. However, we should eventually be able to gain perspective and describe the situation differently, if we are open to our options for healing and recovering.
  • Am I convinced that bad things just always happen to me? Am I expecting bad things to keep happening to me? This perspective can become debilitating because our thoughts are truly powerful. This is a tough perspective that takes some work to overcome and usually takes someone else to help us see it.
  • Am I taking things personally all the time, considering people’s words and actions as a personal affront to me? Even taking people’s reactions as a personal attack on me? It is so important to learn that the way people react says everything about them and nothing about us.

I have touched on just a few aspects of no-options thinking. It is a deep topic and can take some real work to overcome. Getting help is key. As a certified women’s empowerment coach, I have the tools to help you overcome no-option thinking. Reach out to me at the link below to schedule a call with me. Let’s talk to see if we are a good fit for working together to banish this thinking for good and help you find your power! Vision Power Coaching Discovery Call.

Kim Edwards

Kim Edwards

Certified Women's Empowerment Coach
Vision PowerCoaching

about

Kimberlee Edwards

Kim is a certified Women's Empowerment Coach. She founded Vision PowerCoaching because, while working her corporate job, she discovered that the extra chair in her office cubicle was often filled with someone who needed to talk about their life. She loved listening to them and found that she often had an intuition about how to help them.

She is passionate about guiding women through some of life's toughest challenges, relating to divorce, health and family. She helps them to stop feeling overwhelmed with negativity and create a plan to find their personal power, strength and confidence in painful and difficult situations.

Kim teaches women to feel empowered and to come out on the other side of their challenge with gratitude and clarity!

How to Plan The Perfect Staycation

How to Plan The Perfect Staycation

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While a vacation is always amazing, these days, there’s something to be said about planning a  staycation! Particularly when vacation plans may have to be altered, a staycation is a great way to get some rest and relaxation without ever really leaving the place you live and love!

Budget First

Odds are you live where you do because you love it. You love the nearby beach or the incredible mountains or the gorgeous lakes or the indescribable open prairies and fields. You have a list of things you’d love to visit, do or see in your own hometown and this is the perfect time to take advantage of what your area has to offer.

The first step in planning a staycation is to set your budget.  Your budget could mean the difference from checking into the local luxury resort for a long weekend of indulgence or thrifting and antiquing at those cute downtown shops. The best part about a staycation is that the budget is usually a bit more flexible since travel expenses do not need to be factored in to the total amount.

Make Your List And Check Things Off

When you’re planning a staycation, the best part is you get to choose what makes it wonderful! Think of the places you’ve wanted to go; the museums you keep meaning to get to, the trails you plan to hike. Whatever it is that you love about where you live should be on your list. Try going into online neighborhood groups and ask for suggestions of things to do in your area. You’d be surprised at what you learn about where you live. Those new experiences will make your staycation even more memorable!

Get Work Out Of The Way

One of the hardest things about ‘resting and relaxing’ when you stay at home (or nearby) is the temptation to do work and chores you’ve been meaning to when you ‘get the time.’ When you’re planning a staycation treat it as you would a traditional vacation. This time is not for catching up on chores or house projects, this is a time to relax! Get anything you think may distract you from the fun out of the way, and commit to making your staycation a time you relax, refresh and rejuvenate.

How to Plan The Perfect Staycation
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Check Out Local Accommodations

A neat part of a staycation is that you can stay at home but indulge in fancy dinners all week, as you would in a vacation town. Treat yourself to breakfast at a local diner each morning of your staycation. You could even consider ‘staying’ at a different place—a fun and unique bed and breakfast or a beautiful hotel can be your home base for your staycation.

Splurge On Your Own Hobbies

While the temptation to work or do chores may be tremendous and should be avoided on a staycation, the opportunity to indulge in your own hobbies should be fully explored! If you love gardening, splurge on some new landscaping and flowers. Love to decorate and been wanting to redesign your bedroom as a retreat? Take this staycation time to look for just the perfect nightstand and those silky soft sheets that will cradle you each night. Have a pile of books just begging you to turn the pages? Do it! The best part of a staycation is that you have the time to do whatever YOU want. Even if that means taking 3-hour naps every single day!

That’s the thing to remember when planning a wonderful staycation. It really just needs to be a time you’ll be able to relax and do some things for yourself. Whether it’s touring your own town or just cuddling up with your pets and catching up on some Hallmark channel favorites, a staycation is whatever you make it to be. Right where you are.

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Karen Rae

Karen Rae

Owner, Fave Lifestyles
www.FaveLifestyles.com

about

Karen Rae

I was becoming an empty nester, a woman of a more interesting age and in transition. Sound familiar? I was at that place where we question our purpose, value, and worth and what in the world are we going to do with the rest of our lives.

I noticed women have a huge hunger to belong to a community of women where they can feel safe, share openly from their heart and have other women to do life with! This is why I created my Fave Lifestyles.

Fave is for the woman who wants to call Fave her community of women who support, uplift, and make her feel better about herself. I want to create a place where we help her answer life's questions and just do life together!

Let's Do Life Together at Fave Lifestyles

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Do you have a Closet Full of Clothes and Nothing to Wear?

Do you have a Closet Full of Clothes and Nothing to Wear?

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Do you have a closet full of clothes and nothing to wear? You are definitely not
alone!

I’ve heard many clients say they are tired of looking in their closet and – even
though it’s full, and still don’t have much to wear.

The latest statistic is we only actually wear 25% of our clothes. So what about that
other 75%? Some of it could be a special occasion or different season but we all
have clothes we buy but end up wearing. That was me too. And that felt like such
a waste.

Don’t you just hate it when you have an event to go to and you look in your closet
and feel like you have absolutely nothing that you can wear?

You’ve put time, effort and money into that wardrobe, and it can be so
disheartening to feel like you don’t have something to wear for an
event—without going shopping—again!

I’ve discovered that women usually shop for clothes for
one of 3 reasons.

    1. We’re going to an event and need something new.
      There’s a wedding or party. So you run down to our favorite store. They don’t
      have the styles you like. Or there’s nothing in your size. When you find something
      close to what you want, you try it on and it doesn’t really fit right. So you go to
      another store. Maybe you find something. And then you need new shoes and
      accessories. Now this event is starting to really cost you just so you can feel good
      and in style. And you may not wear it again.
    2. It’s on sale.
      I don’t know about you, but there’s nothing like a good bargain. When I see
      something on sale, I tell myself I’ll wear it sometime. Especially casual clothes.
      Then a year later, there it is, hanging in my closet with the tags still on.
    3. Out of emotion
      You’re bored or celebrating or angry or sad, so you go shopping. I used to eat or
      go shopping. It felt great. Until the credit card bill arrived.

I used to hate how I looked because I was overweight. When I found things that
actually fit and looked decent in, it felt great, so I’d buy it. I’d wear it a few times
and if I didn’t get any compliments, it would go to back into my closet where it
would gather dust. Back then, I had been color-typed in the Seasons, and was told
I was a Winter, so back then my closet was full of black and jewel tones. I
occasionally got compliments on my hair or outfit, but never on ME. Something
wasn’t right.

Do you have a Closet Full of Clothes and Nothing to Wear?
*paid advertising

I had a closet full of clothes but nothing to wear.

Then I learned something that changed everything. It was a new system called
Embracing Your Essence, that helped me finally figure out what makes me look
good so that people compliment me on ME, not my clothes or hair. I also finally
saw my closet as something worth investing in.

Clothes are one of the first things people see about you. They convey a message
about you. Even if that message is, “I don’t care.”

I loved the new system so much I became an expert in it and started sharing it
with my hairstyling clients. And their feedback was amazing. They also had
fantastic experiences when they started dressing in their essence.

As an entrepreneur, you probably spend a lot of money on your business. How
often do you think about intentionally building a wardrobe where you can be seen
for who you really are, so that your value is evident at first glance, and so people
feel magnetically attracted to you? One where you feel amazing in everything you
wear, so you don’t have to run to the store to buy an new outfit for that certain
event, and you know you have something for every occasion? Believe it or not it
IS possible to love and use everything in your closet.

But it comes down to how you FEEL in what you’re wearing. That feeling affects
your attitude, self-confidence, and how you move through life.

When you open your closet, it should be like having a party with best friends. You
should feel confident and well-dressed every time you leave your house.

The good news is you can change the old scenario. When you learn your element
with our 5 step system, it takes away the guess work and helps you know what to
buy, where to buy, and gives you the assurance that you won’t be wasting money
on an un-used 75% of your wardrobe anymore.

Discover how to dress to feel fabulous, confident, and truly yourself, a create a
closet that you can add to over time, that will give you joy every time you get to
put on your wonderful clothes.

Getting typed in your element helps you:

  • Know what to keep and what to let go of.
  • Emotionally let go of the things that no longer serve you
  • Dress for how you want to feel and be seen.
  • Only buy what works for you so you don’t keep wasting money.
  • Discover if people see you or what you’re wearing first.

See transformations on my website at EmbracingYourEssence.com and in my free app.

If you would like to learn more about being typed in your essence, book a free 30-
minute Zoom appointment Book a Free Session Here.

about

Danielle LaFleur

Danielle is a serial entrepreneur and has been creating and running businesses for over 20 years.  Danielle Owns Easy As Pie Design a website and marketing firm, specializing in websites designed for engagement and profitability.  She also offers Masterminds and One-on-One MVP Alignment coaching. 

Danielle has been featured in over 30 publications, worked with National Geographic in over 50+ countries, and has created a process for extracting an ROI from an ROE in training and development which is currently being used in over 100+ corporations.

Danielle encourages all of those that work with her to deep dive into their values, maximize those natural talents and skills, and create the life they have always dreamed of. She is a full believer that when you align yourself with who you are meant to be, there is an opportunity around every corner.

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