Do Life and Pain Have to Be Synonymous?

I am reading Charles Swindoll’s book, Esther: A Women of Strength & Dignity. He opens Chapter Four with the sentence: Life and pain are synonymous. I closed the book.

I hate pain. I do everything I can to avoid it, to relieve it, to make sure it doesn’t return. And hearing that life and pain are synonymous means it can’t be avoided, may not be relieved in every circumstance, and just might return when I least expect it ~ no matter what I do.

No matter what we do. In the last month, I’ve watched a dear friend lose her hair to chemo. Another is separated from her husband and getting a divorce. Another is recovering from a major heart attack. My mother-in-law is learning a new normal after the death of my father-in-law, her constant companion for 71 years.

While I sit at my desk, feeling a little achy from a bike ride, a little tired from an early morning run to the airport, a little inconvenienced by a rescheduled meeting, I think about “doing life together.” I think about the beauty of a sunny summer day and the dark clouds of cancer. I look again at my husband’s anniversary card celebrating our 38 years together, knowing another marriage just ended in separation, another in death. While my knee groans from a short bike ride, I wonder how I’d feel if my heart had taken me to the emergency room.

I love that I have so many wonderful women in my life, wise women, women who make me laugh and make me think, women who support and encourage me, women who challenge me. All of us doing life together. One day, one moment, one coffee break, one prayer at a time. Because life and pain are synonymous, but together we can do it. Together. 

Watch Video Below and Meet Deanna!

Deanna Nowadnick

Deanna Nowadnick

Speaker | Writer | Author


Deanna Nowadnick

Before my father died, he reminded me that Mom had asked me to write a book. At the time the boys were in college, and the notion of writing was unfathomable. Writers write books. By the time my boys were adults, I’d run out of excuses. I was also at that age when I could pause and reflect.

Fruit of My Spirit: Reframing Life in God’s Grace was my first publishing endeavor. My second was Signs in Life: Finding Direction in Our Travels with God. Both are collections of stories that tell of God’s love and faithfulness. Both tell of His remarkable grace and mercy.

When not writing, I serve as the Client Service Coordinator for The Planner’s Edge, an investment advisory firm in Washington state. I’m active in my church, serving on the Leadership Team and gathering with a wonderful group of ladies to study and giggle over lattes and chocolate. On my desk is a rock with the words “Choose Joy!” etched in it. It’s my inspiration for each day. As an author, it is my hope that my own words might share that joy we find together as children of God.

With Him, it can be so.


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