As women, setting boundaries in relationships may not come easy. We’re often used to
doing all, being all and giving all to others, and at the risk of losing ourselves in the
That leads to a drain on our emotions and our energy and hinders the development of
quality relationships. Here are a few tips on how to set boundaries in your relationships.
Why Set Boundaries In Your Relationships?
Healthy relationships of any kind have boundaries. A healthy relationship boundary is a
line where you end, and the other person sort of begins. Without those boundaries
being clearly defined, the people in the relationship may be confused and suffer from
Boundaries in relationships show a commitment to mutual respect for feelings and
opinions. Healthy relationship boundaries set expectations for how you want to be
treated, and how you’ll treat the other person in the relationship. Whether it’s with your
partner/spouse, your children, your friends or your coworkers, relationship boundaries
protect you and also allow you to have deep, meaningful connection with the other
How To Set Boundaries In Your Relationships
1. Know Your Needs.
Your needs in a relationship matter, but you can’t expect someone to know them or
understand them if you don’t know and understand them yourself. Be self-aware and
know your likes and dislikes. Know what things you want from your relationships and
what you don’t want and won’t tolerate. Plan on how you want to be treated, and how
you’ll treat the other person within the relationship.
2. Communicate Your Needs.
Again, you can’t expect others to understand your needs in a relationship if they’re not
aware of them. When you’re setting up boundaries in relationships, it’s vital that you
communicate those needs to the other person/people. You can’t expect people to read
your mind, and you need to be clear and direct about your needs and expectations.
Most of the boundary-crossing that happens in relationships is because one person was
not clear and direct about their needs and their boundaries. Communication is key!
3. Manage Expectations.
Just as it’s important for you to communicate your needs, it’s vital for you to manage the
expectations of the other people in your relationships. An important part of setting up
boundaries in relationships is managing the expectations of others. This means you’ll
have to ask them about their expectations and needs, and you’ll have to decide if
they’re ones you find acceptable and with which you can work. If you feel a family
member is taking advantage of your kindness or generosity, talk to them about what
they expect from you and whether or not you can meet their need. Managing the
expectations of others is the best way to respect the boundaries of any relationship, and
to help ensure that your relationship boundaries are not breached either.
4. Know Your Limits
It’s often ingrained upon us that we give, give, give even if that means that we give all of
ourselves and leave nothing. You don’t have to be the super woman of your
relationships. They should be about give and take, and if you’re doing way more of the
giving than you are of the taking, it’s okay for you to set boundary lines for how much
you’re comfortable giving. It’s easy to burn out of relationships in which the boundaries
are too often crossed, but if you know your limits and are ready to exercise them, this
will happen far less.
We sometimes feel like setting up boundaries in relationships sounds harsh, but that
couldn’t be less true. Healthy relationships need boundaries in order for all the involved
parties to thrive. Consider setting up boundaries in relationships an investment in
yourself and others, as doing so allows you to enjoy your relationships to the fullest.
For more great articles about relationships on Fave.com check out these articles:
5 Ways to tell if you have forgiven someone
Let’s Talk Relationships
4 Things to Look for in Authentic Relationships
Owner, Fave Lifestyles
I was becoming an empty nester, a woman of a more interesting age and in transition. Sound familiar? I was at that place where we question our purpose, value, and worth and what in the world are we going to do with the rest of our lives.
I noticed women have a huge hunger to belong to a community of women where they can feel safe, share openly from their heart and have other women to do life with! This is why I created my Fave Lifestyles.
Fave is for the woman who wants to call Fave her community of women who support, uplift, and make her feel better about herself. I want to create a place where we help her answer life's questions and just do life together!
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